The Woman You Put Here With Me: Why We Blame Instead of Own It

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My dearest Daughters,

Today I would like to look closely at Adam's answer in Genesis 3:12, and you'll catch something easy to miss on a first read: "The woman You put here with me — she gave me some fruit, and I ate it." He's not just blaming Eve. He's quietly blaming God, too — if You hadn't given her to me, this wouldn't have happened.

Eve's answer, right after, is at least partly true: "the serpent deceived me, and I ate." She's not lying. But she's also not fully owning it. Both of them tell a version of the truth that leaves out the one sentence God is actually asking for: I chose this.

This is such a human pattern that we barely notice we're doing it. Something goes wrong, and before we've even finished processing what happened, we're already explaining — the stress I was under, the way I was raised, the person who hurt me first, and yes, sometimes, quietly, the way God shaped my life or circumstances. We reach for a true-enough explanation instead of the whole truth, because the whole truth feels too dangerous to say out loud.

Here's what's worth noticing, though: God's question to Adam — "have you eaten from the tree I commanded you not to eat from?" — isn't a trap. It's an invitation to simply tell the truth to Someone who already knows it. Confrontation from God is  never the same as condemnation. And if you keep reading past this passage, you'll find He doesn't walk away from either of them. He clothes them.

Blame is often the fruit of a fear we haven't named: if I'm fully known, I'll be fully rejected. But the actual pattern of this whole story says the opposite — the fuller the truth, the more room there is for grace to meet it.

A few questions to journal on this week:

  • What's your instinct when you're confronted — explain, defend, or own it?
  • Have you ever quietly blamed God for a choice or circumstance that was actually yours?
  • What would it cost you to say "I did this" without adding a "but"?

This is week two of month two in our Crowned & Confident journey — catch the full teaching video and the two episodes before it linked here.

This is week two of month two in our Crowned & Confident journey. You can watch this week's teaching video and catch last week's episode on the first lie on our YouTube channel https://youtu.be/IF5PwP3EUvM 
. Don't forget to join our community Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/share/1AsjUo7P2L/  to discuss it with your sisters!

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